Justification JunctionMarch 1, 2009 at 9:11 pm | Posted in Ramblings | 2 Comments
Tags: disability, disability and marriage, disability and relationships, Megan Cutter, vision
Throughout our relationship, Barton and I have had our share of justifying ourselves, our relationship and our choices. There have been many blunt comments in the name of “being concerned for us.” We live in justification junction.
Trying to verbalize why I was in love and wanted to marry a man in a wheelchair to my grandmother who told me, “You’ll just be a caretaker to a retard for the rest of your life,” was nearly impossible.
We really gave everyone a heart attack when I decided to quit my full time job with benefits, move out of state and start a freelance writing business. How could we possibly move out of state on our own and be successful? And yet, three years after moving to North Carolina, we own a successful writing and communications business that continues to grow.
What many people don’t see on the outside is that instead of succumbing to the “we can’t” mentality, we identify what we need and begin building a solid foundation piece by piece. I hear so many people say, “We can’t, we shouldn’t, how are you going to…” Yes, we have many unique obstacles, but I’ve learned that we have to throw the rulebook out and creatively blaze our own trail.
It’s taken a long time for me to let go of what everyone else thinks and to just do what we need to do. Instead of succumbing to the belief that we cannot accomplish our vision and our mission in our relationship or in life, I’ve learned to acknowledge those concerns and keep on walking. Barton has shown me that he’s had to let go of what people think his entire life. So we nod, we smile, we may even agree and then we go home and do what we are called to do anyway.
So instead of being concerned for us, take a minute to take your shoes off and step out of your box. We don’t have one.